Danger in the Optician's Shop

The next time you inadvertently crap into a Frenchman’s glasses case, please feel free to use the following tiny sample list to help you to explain to him how you came to make such an error. Similarly, the next time you find that you’ve put ink on your meatballs or that you’re being represented in a French court by tropical fruit, this little list of translations from French to English might just get you off the hook.

Lentilles = Lentils
Lentilles = Magnifying glasses
Lentilles = Contact lenses

Lunettes = Spectacles (glasses)
Lunettes = Telescopes
Lunettes = Toilet seats
Lunettes = Car windows
Lunettes = Birds’ breastbones

Abat = torrential downpour
Abats = Offal
Abat-jour = Lampshade

Talons = Talons (bird of prey etc)
Talons = Shoe heels
Talons = Cheque stubs

Pomme = Apple
Pomme = Head of lettuce
Pomme = Potato (even without “de terre”)

Pâté = Pâté
Pâté = Pie
Pâté = Inkblot
Pâté = Sandcastle
Pâte = Pasta
Pâte = Pastry
Pâte = Paste
Pâte = Batter
Pâte = Dough
Patte = Animal’s paw
Patte = Animal’s leg
Pat = Stalemate
Pâté de maisons = A city block
Pâté Impérial = Egg roll

Avocat = Avocado pear
Avocat = Lawyer

Mais = Sweetcorn
Mais = “But….”

No room at all for confusion there, then. Time to add a few new words to the French dictionary, I suspect!

I could do with a new prescription for my eyes but I’m too scared to go to the opticians ;o)